"While You're Under My Roof..."

I am blessed to have supportive, loving, involved parents. Their generosity astounds me, especially during this current phase of my life. However, after more than five years of independence, I find myself in that most frustrating place- back living with my folks.

Thankfully, I have a great relationship with my parents and most of the time, I enjoy their company. But the last week or so, the honeymoon phase has definitely worn off. I find myself bickering with them over the silliest little things. Now I can see that really I am not upset with them at all; we just have different lifestyles and I have grown used to being on my own. None of my roommates cared if I stayed in my room all day, or ate dessert for lunch. They never asked me for a weekly schedule or got upset if I turned them down for dinner, so I could be alone.

It occurs to me that the biggest problem for us right now is the parent child relationship. I see myself as a guest in this house. I can take care of myself, and I don't expect them to cook for me, or set aside their schedule to accomodate my desire to do something. Instead of asking them to change things, I just figured I would be flexible and fit into their current lifestyle. But they see me as their child, which means their world revolves around me. They are constantly trying to find things to do with me to entertain me or make me happy. They constantly ask about my schedule to try and find time to fit these special adventures into my schedule, and they get frustrated when I answer truthfully with "I don't know." The constant questioning drives me nuts. I get frustrated when they keep buying more food than three people can possibly consume, and expect me to eat it all.

It isn't that I am unaware or ungrateful for all that my parents have offered me in this arrangement- At 23, I am totally dependant on my parents. I have no car, no income, school loans to pay off, and fighting off anemia, which has me feeling pretty fatigued most days. Add to this the moodiness that comes with PMS and missing the Boy, and I am not exactly a winning roommate. My parents let me live here rent free. They feed me, pay for my cell phone, let me use the car (don't worry, I do pay for my own gas), and often entertain me for free.

Basically, I need to just let my parents be parents, and stop expecting them to act like roommates. And I am not exactly sure why I didn't understand this to begin with.